Divorce Mediation

Divorce mediation is an idea whose time has come.

Divorce mediation stands in stark contrast to the more “traditional” type of divorce action.

In the “traditional” divorce action, each spouse normally retains his or her own attorney. The job of the attorney for each spouse is to negotiate the best deal on all issues for his or her client that is possible.

The “traditional” system analogizes to having two gladiators fighting vigorously to the best of their abilities for their respective clients.

Somewhere along the line, our judicial system came up with the idea that the clash of these legal titans is the best way for the “truth” to emerge and for the “fairest” settlement to develop.

Experience has taught those of us in the system differently. Most serious practioners of matrimonial law now recognize the limitations that the “traditional” judicial system has to offer divorcing spouses. These limitations include but are not limited to the fact that the Judges are very busy and their calendars are over-burdened, thus often resulting in lengthy delays in the processing of divorce cases; the fact that some judges are more well-versed in family law issues when they first become judges and thus some judges make decisions that are or seem “fairer” than other judges; and a whole host of other factors.

Divorce mediation offers a distinct option to divorcing couples. Instead of hiring two lawyers who often end up essentially fighting it out in Court, the mediating couple attends sessions together with the divorce mediator.

In our practice, Mr. Kaplan meets with both the husband and the wife usually once a week for one hour.

In our experience, most people who begin divorce mediation are able to successfully complete it.

Mediation is certainly not for all couples and certainly those cases involving high conflict, spousal abuse or child abuse, or similar types of issues very well may not be appropriate cases for divorce mediation.

However, it has been our experience that more and more couples are looking for an “amicable” divorce. More and more clients are calling our office and saying, “I want to be fair with my spouse and my spouse wants to be fair with me”.

It is these people that divorce mediation holds the most promise for.

We have found that divorce mediation results in divorces in which the parents are much more effective in co-parenting their children after the divorce. Instead of beating each other up through the Court system they meet with the mediator and work out their differences.

After the divorce, they often seek mediation if other issues should develop that they can’t resolve on their own as opposed to going back to Court for more “matrimonial warfare”.

We are involved with a significant number of mediated divorces and we would be happy to discuss divorce mediation with you. Please feel free to call at any time to discuss this option.

Mr. Kaplan completed general mediation training in 1982 through the Metropolitan Assistance Corporation, Victim Services Agency/Travelers’ Aid Services in Brooklyn, New York while he was attending law school and was awarded a “Mediator’s Certification Award” in 1982.

Mr. Kaplan has been mediating divorce cases for twenty (20) years.