I believe it's important for my clients to understand how to dress appropriately for divorce court. Now, the word "appropriately" means different things depending upon who you are.
If you normally wear jeans, sneakers, and a T-shirt to work and social events, showing up to court in a black suit, white shirt, and black tie may not necessarily be the answer. It might look uncomfortable, insincere, and simply not like you. The goal isn't to become someone you're not. The goal is to look respectful, put together, and like you understand that being in court is important.
My general advice is simple: dress nicely, conservatively, and comfortably enough that you aren't thinking about your clothes while you're in front of the judge. You don't necessarily need to wear a suit. Clean, professional-looking clothing may be perfectly appropriate. Avoid anything overly casual, distracting, revealing, or sloppy. You're appearing in New Jersey Family Court, and your clothing should reflect that you take the proceeding seriously.
And if you are going to wear a suit, do it all the way.
I say this because I've had two occasions where I recommended that male clients wear a suit to court. Technically, they both followed my instructions. They both wore suits.
One client showed up without a belt. "You didn't say that I had to wear a belt too!"
Another client wore a suit, a belt, and black shoes. He also wore white sweat socks with those black shoes. "You didn't say that I couldn't wear white socks!"
Fair enough, I suppose.
So let me be more specific. If you're wearing a traditional suit to court, wear an appropriate shirt, belt, dress shoes, and dark socks. Make sure everything fits properly and looks neat. Apparently, I've learned that I need to say these things.
What you wear isn't going to decide your divorce case, but appearances do matter. Your judge is observing you, listening to you, and evaluating the issues in your case. You want to present yourself as someone who respects the Court and understands the seriousness of the proceeding.
That doesn't mean dressing like someone you're not. You should look like yourself, just the version of yourself who has an important appointment and understands that it matters.
You don't need an expensive suit or an entirely new wardrobe to appear in NJ divorce court. Dress neatly. Dress conservatively. Make sure your clothes fit. Avoid anything that will unnecessarily attract attention. And if your divorce lawyer gives you specific instructions about what to wear, follow them.
Including the part about the belt.
And the dark socks.
Knowing what to wear to court is only one small part of preparing for a divorce. My free Divorce Smarter Course walks you through what you should know before and during a New Jersey divorce so you can make better decisions about your children, your finances, and your future.
Until next time,
Steve