Modifying Custody and Parenting Time in NJ

WHEN YOUR CHILDREN’S NEEDS HAVE CHANGED BUT YOUR COURT ORDER HASN’T

You may already know things aren’t working the way they used to.

Your kids talk about how they don’t want to go to their mother’s house on school nights anymore.

You hear about new “rules” her boyfriend has put in place.

You can sense the stress every time you pick them up.

You’ve tried to keep things steady, but you know this isn’t what’s best for them anymore.

And if your ex has a narcissistic streak, you may be running into the same old tactics — manipulation, guilt, or control disguised as “good parenting.” She may twist the facts, blame you for the tension, or tell the kids stories that make you look unreasonable.

You’ve lived through that before.

Now the focus needs to be on your children and the facts that affect them.

WHAT THE LAW ACTUALLY SAYS

In New Jersey, child custody and parenting time orders can be modified when there has been a substantial change in circumstancesthat affects the children’s welfare.

Judges don’t make changes lightly.

They look for real, lasting shifts — not temporary problems or personality clashes.

The law’s guiding principle is always the best interests of the child.

That means the court examines what arrangement best supports your children’s emotional, educational, and physical well-being today — not what made sense years ago when the original order was entered.

WHAT JUDGES CONSIDER

When deciding whether to modify custody or parenting time, judges often look at:

• Each parent’s relationship with the children

• The stability and safety of each home

• School performance and emotional adjustment

• The children’s preferences, depending on their age and maturity

• Whether either parent is trying to alienate or manipulate the children

• Any significant changes in work schedules, health, or living situations

The court’s concern is not who “wins,” but what arrangement gives your children the most secure and healthy daily life.

WHEN THE OTHER PARENT IS NARCISSISTIC

Narcissistic parents often use the children as pawns.

They may withhold information, block communication, or make every small issue into a power struggle.

The best response isn’t to fight fire with fire — it’s to build calm, detailed documentation that shows what’s really happening.

When the court sees steady, fact-based parenting on your side and instability on the other, the contrast speaks volumes.

MY ROLE

For nearly forty years I’ve represented parents across New Jersey in custody and parenting time matters — both during divorce and long after it.

These cases are among the most sensitive in family law because they affect what matters most: your relationship with your children.

My job is to help you understand what evidence truly matters, what changes meet the legal standard, and how to present your case clearly and respectfully.

Every family situation is unique.

Some cases are resolved through careful negotiation or mediation.

Others require court action.

Either way, I am available to guide you through each step with focus and discretion.

WHEN YOU’RE READY TO TALK

If you believe your current custody or parenting time arrangement no longer serves your children’s best interests, we can discuss it privately.

Call my assistant, Valerie, at (732) 250-3315 to schedule your strategy session with me personally. We’ll go over:

• Your current order and what’s changed

• How the court evaluates modifications

• Practical steps to strengthen your case

• What you can realistically expect in court

Until next time,